EXPERIENCE 005

An on-going comment thread to my FB timeline post
(continued also from Experience 002 on Whole Human)

​Conversation between Ken Matsushima and Gary Smith.

​Gary
A few times today, I've been 'on my way' to delete my last comment to you, as it felt not fully well. I started to delete twice, then stopped, and would have this time, but for your response. Well, glad it didn't get deleted so we could have this further, more honest conversation.

Ken
One of those weaknesses - perhaps the most serious - is that even in my best moments, my conversation program is handicapped by autism. The self Ive had to deal with has been a cold, rather arrogant bastard who is extremely poor at expressing those supportive, humanistic characteristics that make a person "likeable".

Gary
Yes, I have struggled with some of those characteristics also.

Ken
That reflects flaws in the AI Ken program ... it has nothing to do with the True Self. If youre making the mistake of confusing the two, maybe you need to consider that you might have missed something, along the way.

Gary
No, I've not confused the two. Yes, surely I have missed things along the way.

Ken
Maybe it is because you are STILL confusing the AI program with the true self?
Look, I cant see into your head, so I have no way of knowing what experiences you have and have not had, but surely if youve been interested in spirituality for so many years, you would have stumbled across at least one or two methods for stilling the internal dialogue. If you honestly and sincerely have NOT, then I can suggest some options for you to consider.

Gary
Yes, I've tested various techniques and none were effective, and I've seen no example of their effectiveness in others, nothing I would emulate. I aspire to a vision of humanity not seen.

Ken
"Those characteristics are such things as unconditional love, equanimity, kindness, compassion, non-judgment, and so on." Those are the characteristics of the True Self.
If I was capable of remaining CONSTANTLY in tune with the True Self, I surely would not be wasting my time posting messages on Facebook.

Gary
Exactly. Same here.

Ken
You are speaking to *Ken* -- a very reclusive autistic who doesnt really enjoy human company, and who has always displayed a prickly, deliberately off-putting personality due to the nature of autism.

Gary
Thank you for sharing that. I appreciate your honesty, and the opportunity to know you better. You remember, I had an appointment to be professionally diagnosed. But with COVID-19, that didn't happen. I imagine my autism is not as intense as yours, but my misophonia is more severe.

Ken
People capable of remaining CONTINUOUSLY in a state of direct contact with the True Self come along about once every five to ten centuries or so.

Gary
That seems about right. Yet with the current shift, might not something new be possible? That is my vision. It took my whole life til recently to realize the state of humanity. I am still dumbfounded by the human condition. Someone has to pioneer a new breed. Or not. I have to be able to let it go, too.

Ken
Until you can appreciate the true relationship between the imperfect individual and the Source, youre going to remain confused. The only thing I can do to address your confusion is to recommend exercises that still the internal dialogue. If you honestly, sincerely have never encountered one of these exercises, I will post a list of recommended sources. But Im guessing that youre just being deliberately obtuse. Yoga, mantra, prayer, japa, tai chi, karma yoga, asana, zen contemplation, sufi dance, self-inspection, etc etc etc . . . all of these methods WORK. For that matter, so does the breathing-based visualization method that youve been pursuing.

Gary
Maybe I'm being obtuse. And have too high expectations (People capable of remaining CONTINUOUSLY in a state of direct contact with the True Self). Thank you for mentioning the breathing-based visualization method, as that is where my heart is.

Ken
But until you choose one, and devote yourself to it thoroughly until the glimpses start to come, nothing that I say can help. People can give you maps and point out directions to try to help, but as the old spiritual song describes:

"When you reach that lonesome valley
You have to cross it by yourself
Nobody else can cross it for you
You have to cross it by yourself"

Ken
Yes, I played guitar and sang that song, as a teen. Nice memory. Again, thank you.

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Unrelated to the above:

EVIDENCE OF CRACKDOWN ON HUMAN TRAFFICKING.